Food for Thought

Quotes

"It's O.K. to eat when you are hungry and to cry when you are sad. But ice cream won't ever alleviate sadness, and potato chips will not subdue anger."

"There is no food that will fill emotional hunger and no diet that will curb it."

"Physical hunger is when your body needs nourishment. Emotional hunger is when your soul needs nourishment. Find out what it is you are truly hungry for."

from The Don't Diet, Live-It Workbook

There are important reasons why you over or under eat.

Every single time you eat when you are not hungry, obsess about food or your body or don't eat when you are hungry, you are crying for help.

If diets worked most Americans would be thin and happy by now.

"Safely expressing your feelings is the opposite of bingeing."

"Physical hunger is when your body needs nourishment. Emotional hunger is when your soul needs nourishment."

"As you begin to stop over and under eating, you'll also begin to understand why you did so in the first place."

from The Don't Diet, Live-It Workbook

On any given day 48 million Americans are dieting.

Every year, 65 million Americans choose from 30,000 diet plans.

In 1992, the National Institutes of Health held investigatory hearings and concluded that diets do not work and may even be dangerous to one's health. They also concluded that 98% of those who lose weight on diets gain it back within 5 years and 90% of those gain back more than they lost!

Conservative figures show that 150,000 women die each year from dieting-related causes.

The average fashion model is 5'9" to 6' tall. The average American woman is 5'4" tall. The average fashion model weighs 110-118 pounds. The average American woman weighs 142 pounds.

More than 75% of American women claim they "feel fat."

Statistics taken from: Overcoming Overeating newsletter

Articles

It is sad to say that food and weight obsession has reached epidemic proportions in our culture. We are seeing clients as young as 6 years old who are dieting, and women and men in their 70's who have been emotionally eating for most of their lives, and all ages and types of food and weight issues in between. What a tragedy, and at the same time, what a gift for us to be able to share with our clients, the tools and concepts needed to learn to heal from the prison of disordered eating. Each of the therapists at InnerSolutions have struggled with, and conquered, their own food and weight issues, and so we bring to you, not only our professional expertise, but our personal experience as well.

The diet paradigm teaches us that there are "good and bad" foods. You know the drill: Good equals salad, fruit, fat-free, low-carb. Bad is... everything else! At InnerSolutions, we teach people how to listen to their bodies rather than their diet-filled minds when making food choices. This takes time, courage and support. It is critical to learn how to stop restricting and dieting because this only leads to overeating and a preoccupation with food. If dieting worked, most Americans would be thin by now. Additionally, the multi-billion dollar diet industry would be shrinking rather than growing. Dieting leads to overeating and overeating leads most people right back to restriction. The way out of this unending cycle is to reveal and heal the unconscious issues and problems that you have been eating over. It is possible to break free from the chains of food and weight obsession. It is possible to eat delicious, satisfying, moderate meals and not gain weight (unless you are underweight and need to). It is possible to learn to safely express difficult emotions and feel a sense of relief and peace afterwards. It is possible to feel a sense of connectedness and live more in the present moment. It is possible to change some of your internal rules and still be safe in the world. It is possible to live a life that is about more than the size of your thighs or the amount of carbs in your day. We wish this for you...

To Move Or Not To Move, That Is The Question
by Andrea Wachter, LMFT

Having spent the majority of my life in the grips of exercise addiction, I am happy to report that yesterday I spent the morning in bed reading... GUILT FREE!! I then went to work, ate delicious, non-diet meals throughout the day and went to bed without a trace of shame or remorse. Today I took a slow walk in the woods and the only reason I looked at my watch at all was to make sure I would know how much time I had left before I needed to get back. Not because I was calculating my cardio, my calories or my credibility as a human being!

In the same way that the diet industry taught me that there were good and bad foods and my well intentioned family taught me that there were good and bad feelings, the fitness industry did a number on me (and so many of us), with exercise.

We are all born with a natural desire to move, play and rest in our bodies. Thanks to the messages we are surrounded by (but only everyday!) this innate knowing is transformed into an unnatural relationship to cardio counting, sets and reps of weight lifting and a myriad of fitness classes that you may or may not even enjoy. Or perhaps you are on the other end of the pattern and you can barely get yourself to exercise at all.

I hear countless clients telling me about how they "should" get themselves to the gym, they "should" go for a walk, they "should" join that yoga class. What they want to do has gotten so lost in a world of "shoulds" that they can barely even feel what their body is desiring and needing.

I often ask my clients, "If you knew that you could never gain or lose a single pound till the day you die, how much would you exercise? How would you move?" It really changes the playing field, so to speak. So often, faces will soften, deep breaths will be taken. Responses will frequently include: walking slower, moving slower, resting more, stretching more, dancing some. When "exercise" is no longer linked to weight loss or weight maintenance (a.k.a. Self worth) then a person can truly move how they want to move and rest without a shred of guilt.

I remember the day that I took a vow to only move how I wanted. I remember telling a friend how terrified I was. I said, "If I go from running 5 miles a day (which at that point I was whether I wanted to or not!) to only doing what I feel like, how am I not going to blow up? I mean, do the math!" She gently and knowingly replied, "It's not about math, sweetie."

So I decided I would take one week and only do what I truly wanted to do and if after one week, I couldn't fit through the door or my jeans, I would reevaluate the plan. I have never looked back. I look in for my answers now. I rest when I want to. I walk slowly when I want to. I walk fast when that feels right. I do yoga when I want to and if I am planning to do yoga and my body doesn't feel into it, I often end up in the bathtub with a novel. What a concept.

Incidentally, I do the same thing with food and feelings now too! I no longer see foods as good or bad. Every food is created equal to me. Not nutritionally of course, but morally. I approach my meals with only these questions in mind: Is it exactly what my body wants? Is it nutritious and delicious? Is this a loving and honest amount?

As for feelings, well they are the guideposts to it all. So many of us have been raised with well meaning phrases like, "Shhhh, don't cry. Here's your pacifier, or here's a cookie." Or, "Go to your room and come out when you have stopped your tantrum." Recovering from an addiction- be it food, exercise or any one of the many ways we humans can attempt to fill our internal emptiness- means recovering your natural relationship to emotions. Learning to cry when you are sad and safely express anger when you are mad.

The diet and fitness industries and our culture may not have taught us how to eat, move and cry without guilt or shame but fortunately there are many safe places out here where we can learn. Wishing you sweet rest, joyous movement and a peaceful relationship with food and feelings.